i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again 

The rain makes all things beautiful.The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn't it rain on you? 

At dis moment in time 10 million people r having sex.5 million people r drinking coffee.100 million people r sleeping & 1 stupid fool is reading my text!pass on 

A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home 

Jesus says to John come forth ill give you eternal life. John came fifth he won a toaster 

Hey friend remember dat without stupidity there can be no wisdom & without ugliness there can be no beauty… so the world needs YOU after all! 

Hey can u do me a favour, take a pic of urself n send me it, i'm playin cards n i'm missin the joker!! 

i tried to call you from a payphone last night. i put my doner card in by mistake, it cost me an arm and a leg! 

A man can kiss his wife goodbye. A flower can kiss a butterfly.Wine can kiss a frosted glass.But u my friend can kiss my ass! 

It's important to find a man who has money, a man who adores you,a man who is great in the sack. It's also imprtant that these 3 men should never meet! 

Your provider adjusted his rates. The rate is determined by the length of your genitalia, the shorter they are, the less you pay. You can telephone for free from now on! 

You'd better not be a dayfly and not having your day. 

You with your beautiful eyes, you with your nice hair, you with your fantastic body ... o, sorry, wrong number 

You will have to cut back on your sex live. What part will you leave out, talking about it or thinking about it? 

You used to be so ugly that your mother had to tie a steak around your neck, otherwise even the dog would not play with you. 

You should know what it takes to look this cheap! 

You have the ones that think and you have the ones that do things. The worst kind are those who think that they are doing things. 

You got STYLE... You got SEX-APPEAL... You got the BRAINS... and you sure as hell got the BODY....WAIT!!!!!...SORRY....wrong number 

You are never too blond to learn !!!