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Adult Messages
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| GUY: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. GAL: If I see you naked, I'd probably die laughing. |
| hereby place u under arrest 4 violating code 69 - distracting public with ur xtreme good looks &sex appeal.remain silent & report 2 my bedroom |
| Hello!Im a little alien called Kan.I have taken the form of a mobile phone- your phone.And during this message I have been having sex with your thumb! |
| If your right leg was thanksgiving and Your left leg was Christmas could I meet U between the holidays? |
| Roses are red.voilets are corny.when i think of you babes it makes me so HORNY!!! |
| Jack & Jill went up da hill 2 have a little fun.But stupid Jill forgot da pill and now they have a son |
| A man said 2 his doctor 'everytime I look in the mirror I get an erection' the doctor said 'That's because u look like a cunt! |
| Ek Ladka Ladki ... aha !!Raat Ke Andhere me ... aha !!Jhaadi ke piche ... aha !!Daba Daba ke ... aha !!Chus Chus ke ... aha !!FROOTI pe rahe the ... aha !! ;-)) |
| Zandu Balm,Zandu Balm,Gote karde Jam,Lund ki Khujli Dur Kare,Chut ko De Aaram,Zandu Balm, Zandu Balm.. |
| Miya aur bibi me bhayanak jhagda ho gaya.Miya gusse se titmilata hua chillaya- gaand maar doonga!!!Bibi boli:"Aage ki to sochte nahin, bus peeche pade rehte ho.." |
| Laloo bada chalak hai, 9 bacho ka baap hai,loloo bada nirala hai,Daswe aanewala hai,ye andar ki baat hai, isme atal ka haath hai.... |
| GIRL: Doc, my boobs are hard & aching. DOC: Let me see (feels them & makes faces) GIRL: DOC! Is it bad?!! DOC: Not only bad- it's contagious! My dick s hard & Aching! |
| Woman complaining to dentist: "I'd rather get pregnant than have a tooth filled!" Dentist: Decide so I can adjust the chair accordingly..! |
| A priest saw a girl removing her blouse. The priest prayed: God, please close my eyes. When he opened his eyes, the girl was naked This time he prayed God please close your eyes. |
| 3 Sardar were stroking there cock very fast n hard in restaurant. waitress: What the hell r u doin? Sardar:V r hungry & the menu says "FIRST CUM FIRST SERVE". |
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| I Tried Phone Sex Once, But The Holes Were Too Small. |
| A woman gave birth to 6 babies, on seeing this she got off the hospital bed and slapped her husband and shouted, "I told u not to do in doggy style." |
| Dear lady subscribers: due to a fault in magnetic field and signals of our service your handsets will vibrate for one hour So keep it in your pussy & enjoy! *Customer Care* |
| what makes a happy man?daughter on the cover of cosmo.son on the cover of sports illustratedmistress on the cover of playboyand .... wife on the cover of " missing persons " |
| old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die. wanted her tombstone to read BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN. the engraver shortened it to " RETURNED UNOPENED " |
| 75 yr old man got married to a 15 yr girl.on their first night both were crying. why???coz she didn ' t know anything, and he had forgotten everything |
| Boy: "Pura andar gaya ?" Madam: "Haan gaya ." Boy: "Dard hua kya?" Madam: "Bahut hua" Boy: "Chalo doosra sandal try kartay hai madam!" |
| Difference b/w panties of 1970 & 2000 :- In the 70's you had to pull down panties to see the buttocks,In 2000, you have to seperate the buttocks to see the panties. |
| Did you know that Condoms have serial nos?It's on the rim.....U dont know that...?It's okay...It's probably becoz you dont roll them that far anyway.... |
| Q.Why does the pleasure of Sex diminish after marriage?A: Because the realisation hits u that u are in bed with a relative. |
| Priest lost his COCK, asked during mass: Any1 got a cock? All men stood up. I mean anyone seen a cock? All women stood up. I meant any1 seen my cock? All nuns stood up. |
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